Love is......

My final post of 2008.

Thank you for the, weirdly, and incredibly now, thousands of people who have visited in your 45 short days....

Happy New Year.

Love is,this song.

Hmmmmmmm....

This is the quotient of me that I can fail to explain.
I know it's early in the eye tattoo game, and I would never get a blob tattooed on my eyeball, but if they get this crackin right I would mildly entertain a small b for Boston, my son.

This is very strange correct?

The Point

I'm so busy, with so much goin on, and I gotta get this thing dealt with, and dman it I'm late here, and this deadline isn't gon.......

Ahhhhhhhhhh.

Right......

Help me Understand

Why in the fuck do Mamas do this?!
I don't have a judgement about normal surgery, although typically I'm not a fan.
But this is fuckin stupid.
I don't wanna put my already feeble cock between a pair of tits that make him look EVEN smaller.
And that "two bowling balls weirdly inserted into my mama" vibe just don't seem like a fun trip.
I've seen some naturally big breasted women do some delightfully evil tricks with tits. A woman named Gianna Michaels comes to mind. Bless her heart and hit xhamster.com now for treats, but this broad up here, and millions like her fuckin trip me out.
Newsflash!!!!! the looks you get at the store are looks of pity and tryin to briefly get inside your mind to understand why the fuck you would do this to your body. They aren't mmmmmmmmm, yumm tumm looks.

Seriously....

Call a cab tommorra night. For real.

Step off....

George Harrison. Them other cats were rad, sure, but this dude may have thrown up the best ballad these cats ever had. And they never invited the guy by the fuckin studio.
Always makes me wonder a bit how and what else this guy had. He brought a ton as it is, but them two egonian (new word) monsters didnt'e want to let the other get over, let alone a third.
There's no way I don't ever sit back and beam and dream when this comes my way....

Dadmaged

Can we please please for 2009 get this kid away from his parents and have them fuckin killed.
This is such a god damn bummer I can't even see straight.
You should have to pass a parent test in order to have kids....this fuckin sucks.

Weed is alive and well.....

Please stay with this, and enjoy some weeded college kid mutilate his finger in the immortal inspiration of Jackass.....Please meet

Johnny Nailville.

Hero

Just when I was starting to get my grumpy about my job as "key master" tommorra at the NYE shindig I'm goin to, because that's always what the sober guy ends up bein, I find this gem.
At my very very best, when I'm deeply in the zone of good, I'm this guy.
Praise Lloyd Dobler.

Just Because

There is no greater talent on the globe.

Period.

10....9....8.....7...

Welcome to maybe the worst night of the year. Not because it's not awesome, and the watching of the old year coming into the new one. The trenchcoat of a year of wounds, and mistakes bein shed for the new coat that will invariably look the same this time next year.
But because of the perverse expectations we all put on it.
It's time for me to take a breath and realize I'm in exactly the right place. That I'm happy to be a part of whatver is around me. That I don't have to have this chasing and desperate feeling in my gut that it's definately more fun "over there", wherever the fuck "over there" may be.
The human condition is all over me. And I wanna stop long enough each day to certainly try and find a daily reason to connect to, that isn't about fillin my bank account, or arguin to be right, or suffocating someone else's views so that I can "win".
I want to find the proper amount of ambition so that I can enjoy "things and stuff" without having it be my "primary purpose" or how I define who I am.
All things are possible. This I know.

For us all.

So settle in. Find the joy where you are tonight, kiss that mama or papa like it's the last time and the first time you will this year.

And remember that bravery is far more beautiful when it's never seen or shown in the most mundane and casual behavior.

Life is right here and right now.

I wanna find it today.

sp

Mr. and Mrs. Perfection

Have an awesome 2009.
Two people really can have it all.

(jet and island and beautiful kids included)

Listen up you TURD

I hope you have a rotten fuckin 2009.
No one has earned ill will more than you. Something is very close to bringin down your house of oily cards. I can feel it. Until I can dance loudly on your metaphorical grave, just know I hope you get the weirdest, most enflamed patch of anal warts.

Nice look here, by the way. You look like you are tryin a bit. Which makes me wanna tell you how shityy and slovenly you still look.

Fuck off dirty greaseball.

Amazing

You wanna talk about how dark it is before the dawn?!
this fuckin zeeb for a minute was in "that" place. The lonliest zeeb on Earth place. And faced with extinction, he mans the fuck up.
I love this fucker.

I wanna meet this zeeb fuckin bad!

Attn: Tila Tequila

You are the single biggest piece of hugry ambitious Thai trash ever.
And I don't even know if you are Thai.
I'm tryin to figger out why or how you are even in my radar.
WHAT DO U DO??!!!
You really are famous, for the desperation of tryin to be famous.
IT'S FUCKIN GROSS!
gimme 3 min I gotta go peep you......
sorry it took 2 min.
You wanna be a singer.
lololololololololol.....

ok sorry.

I'm in a really bad mood, so I somewhat apologize now, but fuck babydollThai. I mean cmon.

From now on when I'm hungry I'm just gonna say "fuck, I'm 'Tila' man let's eat."
Famous is not gonna make you happy or fulfill you babe. It's just gonna open up so many other other utencils to use so you don't have to get to the truth, which is you needed to get fuckin hugged more when you were a kid.

whatever....

FYI

I'm in a really bad mood. I'd fuckin duck today, or hope you don't come into focus..... I'm ready to bring the hate.

Vlog talks to Jon Gruden

Attn: John Gruden

After starting the season 9-3, and then watching you coach my team into a december collapse, I can only hope you fuckin decide to be honorable and quit coachin. You caddyin is a good look..... you fuckin asshole.
If I could mouthfuck your wife I would.

I hate you.

Thanks Santa

See ya next year. Hope those flights your bookin right now on the phone for you and Mrs. C get you some place warm and safe for your vacation...

Yo Elvis....

On your very best day, you would never be allowed to suck this guys dick.
Yeah good thing God took this dude early in a plane wreck. Good lookin out, G-man.
You jerk.

There was OTIS, and the rest are just, well, gettin fat and dyin on toilets.

Help!!!!

What is this cottage cheese shit!? And why do mamas eat it??!!
It looks like someone spent 5 days tearin off the heads of q-tips and soaked them in a bowl of skim milk.

why mamas?

Orange County Bar Brawl 92

Sweep the leg!!!!! And if that doesn't work grab a beer bottle, or a chair, or a brass knuckle.
This UFC shit is fun, no doubt. But the idea that they try to compare it to an artform like boxing is ridiculous.
This is nothin more that fuckin badass doormen who have taken a few months of wrestlin classes. Period.
There's a big card tonight, evidently. Not that I would fuckin know.
But I'm rollin up to a buddies to watch, and go "ooohhhh" and watch the timeless endeavor of men dominating other men. This I can apreciate.
Just don't make me hang out with any of these guys. If you put every ufc dude on earth in a room, you still couldn't drum up enough braincells to solve a beginner crossword puzzle.
Let the fuckin "rear naked chokes" (UFC term) commence!

Dealbreaker

I can get past a lot. But if my Mama sounded like this after I was funny to her, there is just no way I could keep it stiffed.
word.

Educational

Best "you know you shouldn't be doin this cause she's a soulcrusher, but you can't help yourself" grudge-fuck anthem of all time.
When you get old, it's about slow and groovy, and snaps and growls.

Vlog The Inhaler (warning)

Love Is.....

The guy is cooked, done, over, wants nothin more to do with his existance, is questioning everything, and with one word, she drags him back up above the water. There's just no better way for me to articulate it than this.
Is it corny, sure. I don't give a fuck.
It's what I'm lookin for. I can get into a thousand different discussions about partnership and compromise, and planning, and timing, and be smart about choices, but if at the end of the day the actual FEELING of this clip isn't there, it's a wash.
I've only had it once.

Homosexual activity

As a straight guy, there's no interest on ANY level to EVER be in any of these positions with those faces, for ANY reason at all, EVER.

NO on 8 somersaults from 50 feet up with a torqued out fuckface.

pass.

WOW!!!!!!!!

This is not good for whitey. I thought for SURE we would always have a LOCKDOWN on this sport. Looks like that is over.
I don't know this kids name, but he already looks like he's gonna salchow right over any white gay Russki we can throw at him.
HEY BLACK FOLK!!!!!!! CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE US ONE THING!!!!!
FUCK.....
We had tennis, and you own that now with Mama Serena and sis.
The only thing we got left is men's diving.
Another "gay-dude-only" sport.
This kid already looks like he's about to be the Michael Jordan of Toe Loops and Quad axles.

God? You there?

It's gets no bleaker than this. Some dude in Covina, a serious churchgoer I might add, had a big chat with his "higher power" and I guess the next life move after prayer and med was to dress up as Santa and roll over to his ex-wifes parents house and lay waste to everyone there celebrating the holidays.
I was gonna post a pic and throw the dudes name out, but it's the same three name name, disgruntled, weirdo type that you sometimes see in the grocery store, and look back at and think, "that dude is creepy".
It's a wacky place, the world.
Embrace the day. It's ultimately all we have. As trite as that sounds.
It really is.

Moderation please

Hey Mamas the next time you get fuckin livid because the Marc Jacobs bag wasn't under the tree after pointless vain attempts to hint, just take a quick gander into the life of your sisters from other nations.....

So close, yet so far...

I'd be beating this fuckin guys ass. Anyone who devotes two entire fucking weeks of their life to this is an idiot anyway, but fuck I'd hate to run up against this nerd at a party...

JENGA!!!!!

oh yeah, Merry X-mas Will!!!

Vlog The Inhaler

Merry X-mas to me!!!!!!!!

There aint much on my list... but with this at the top, you can forget about the rest of it......

Beware HSS (Holiday Sucka Syndrome)

No other time of year produces more fuckin nightmare relationships than this period right here.
The Holiday Sucka Syndrome.
From the day after Thanksgiving until Dec. 26th, all humans should postpone any decisions regarding commitment. Period.
You're with that girl you been datin a bit, and still on the fence about her emotional state, and a couple of walks thru the local mall, and you're fucked.
It's the season man. Human beings ultimately WANT everything that this time is. The season of giving. The season of family. The season of increased intimacy. All these things rulem sure.
But never have I seen more people tryin to fit a square peg in a round hole more than at this time.
Persoanlly I am not immune. Who doesn't wanna feel the immense nature of "bein together" around the fire, giidy-eyed, and full of the love high, whilst tots tear wrapping paper from the boxes of treats anxiously await....... oh fuck THAT!!!!
Don't fuckin take the bait. It's a monster trick. And all single people on Earth should put all major decisions regarding commitment on hold.
Your prospective mama or papa looks better, sounds better, fucks better, communicates better, slinks better, makes more sense. I'M FUCKING TELLING YOU NOW!! IT'S THE HOLIDAY LIGHTING!!!!!!

Attn: Scientologists

Bear with me you rascally bunch of space travellers. I'm new.
Your "God" is an intergalactic alien named Xenu? And you wanna hook me up to a machine that registers and counts the number of "Body Thetans" in me, which are supposedly blocking me from ole Xenage himself?
And as I "level-up" I get the glorius opportunity to pay thousands more and more for each level I reach?
And there are wacky tales about cruise ships full of Zombies you are breaking down to "work" at the Headquarters to spread the word.
I live seconds away from a lot of Alien "centers" and the worker bees seem to be dressed up in a standard uniform that reminds me of them freaky soldiers in the movie "The Wall" from Pink Floyd.
Lemme just start by saying, YOU FUCKERS ARE WEIRD AS IT GETS!!! Like, well, "other world" weird.
At my age, I really try to come from a place of tryin to see it the other persons way. But you fuckin BeezlyBobs are just way too out there for me. Period. It's spooky and culty and so far gone, that it's impossible for me to even start to open my mind. First, because I don't want that machine you got droppin any Space Invaders into my noodle. And second, well, it's just too fuckin creepy.
BUT HERE'S THE RUB>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I know a lot of Scientologists, and virtually (space term) all of them seem to be pretty well-adjusted folk, who lean heavily on takin responsibility for their behavior, and desperately tryin to seek out from within how to be a more functional, inspirational, evolved, outta self creature.
They seem to be pretty happy folk, who are in an eternal mode of not personalizing other peopl's behavior or where other people are comin from. They seem to wanna allow people to have their own experiences, and they aren't real interested in bein controlling judgemental creeps.

So, that bein said, far be it from me to say what is or isn't good for any individual.
To each his very own. And I mean this.
The Celoeb marketing to try and grow membership sucks ass, and I believe that like anything spiritual, that self-promotion attached to the human condition is a dumb move, and ultimately will hurt them. But I'm not in charge of their marketing department.

And keep that fuckin xbox mind meld machine away from me.....

Live Long and Prosper Xenumaniacs.

Attention Beyond-ce

Please Beyondce, meet Arianna...
there's only so mnay ways to say "this is the fuckin greatest thing i've ever seen today".
Now if anyone wants to say that people in the public eye aren't role models, I only offer up this piece of perfectness.

vlog the impaler

test.... fun ensues soon

The Love Yoda

Meet Pat Allen, AKA fuckin the "Love Yoda".
In a nutshell, she teaches that men need to feel respected, and women need to feel nurtured and safe. Either person can be the "male energy", and the "female energy", but you can't have two "Mamas" or two "Papas" in a relationship or you are fucked.
I had the honor, and I mean that, to see her a few times when I was in a relationship. And in three sessions she articulated the bad news. Two "male" energies in a relationship.
We were cooked inside of 4 months.
I would never want anyone to leave the glory of Shanepowers.com, but right now, click HERE, and buy everything. She will change your fuckin life......

Meow

lololololol... that is all.

Asian Persuation

I've always had a thing for ANY girl sportscaster, because, well, they are talkin about sports.. this average Asian mama slipped into my list...

White Guy gone real Wrong.....

When you're white and in a club or any other social scenario and black guys are watchin you dance, this unfortunately is what they see... it doesn't even matter if you got a decent style groove...
I'm embarassed for my own color scheme purely because of this shit....
This guy has set any half cool white guy dancer man back 50 years...The only place this dance should be takin place is at the BOTTOM of the river.

the most Broots of Broots

White Guys gone real right......

quite possibly the sickest white guy jam ever. Not a big Who Dude, but there's just no fuckin way i Can stop my face from throwin up a dope funky sneer when this pops off.
I undoubtedly fuck just a tad better with this in the background. The Bass line is just fuckin the sickness.

Undefeated Treats!!

The Weapon may be the most comfy high-top ever. And with special guy Undefeated run, I'm fuckin in, BIG!

notice the similarities....

Leadership

That did not suck.
It's so fascinating to think about how the world coulda been so insanely different had Stalin Churchill, and Roosevelt not been around.
Personally I woulda had no problem with them just giving France to the Germans, but they can't be perfect.

Your Daughter is.......

Well if she's between the ages of 19 and 26 and lives in L.A. or NYC, she's more than likely on coke.
This shit is cyclical. The early to mid 90's was "Beechwood Cyn sad misunderstood girl heroin chic".
And to say that coke is back would be an understatement.
After spending the weekend out a bit, and watching the sadness of young amateur girls chewin their faces off, and way too gleeful to hop rides and chase rough rough dudes all around L.A. it's apparent that lotsa fun new life lessons are about to be learned.
Now far FAR be it from me to have a judgement about anyone's chemical intake, but the young girl coke thing is far more depressing to watch than 90's Heroin Girl.
Heroin Girl is much obliged to lay around and play some guitar and watch bad tv.
Coke chick is in fiend mode. Chase mode. Desperado mode.
It's always started because a young one is too drunk, and with a bump she sobers back up perfectly, and feels cuter, sexier, smarter, and real clse to fake perfect.
If it could all end right there, we'd all be fine.
unfortunately, it's always eight hours later in a hotel room with some dudes she would never normally be around, with the sadness and depression that the come down is bringin.
I know this is part of the deal. I know that its phase-esque. And most have their minute and decide to steer clear.
But man, watchin the phase aint pretty.

Hey George!!! 30 days bitch!!

To the GREATEST President of the 21st century. You hearby have been notified that you have 30 days to vacate the premises, as you have been fuckin evicted.

for moving help go HERE.

Now fuck off.

Gratuitous, shirtless, ACTUALLY lost in nice longing thought because of Darth Gaydar song pic

Darth Gaydar

There's a 20 percent chance I'm gay because I love this song. But I don't really give a fuck. It's totally ok to be gay.
It may be representative of wanting, and setting myself up for shit that just will never work so I can continue to be "tortured".
With relationships I mean.

FUCK. Maybe I AM GAY.

the showdown II

Forever... the argument will reign.

The Showdown

It's quite simply one of the BIGGEST arguments ever.
Which was the better mode of transpo for a guy at 4 yrs old.
The Big Wheel came first and revolutionized the genre with its easy balance, low center of gravity smooth ride. It also had the simple but highly effective "spin-out" break that, if mastered correctly, was hours of fun.
But who could ever EVER forget the moment the kid who's family had the most money in the neighborhood, came screamin around the corner in the Green Machine.
There was obviously an immense and immediate feelin of terror, as I saddled up my BW. New sleek design, innovative steering carriage, and intimidating color scheme. And fuck it was a "machine"!
With all the fake non-interest I could muster, I challenged Brian Pistorius to a race. It was a quiet, and lonely time.
I will never TELL anyone who won. It's the stuff of legend. Only to really be experienced by those that were there. But after the race of legends, it was fair to say that both vehicles, with their gorgeouss differences, were both firmly embraced for their own specificities.
The debate rages on.......

Faruco Bowl 16

On a purely gratuitous post that NO ONE will give a shit about, I, after 15 long years, am in the title game of my keeper fantasy football league. The Farco Football League was formed in 1992, and I joined the year after in 1993. Pictured above is me, owner of the Sorry Sal's Stormin Tumors with the coach I play against tommorra, Joe Craig, and his team The Cragorian Apocalyptic Valkyries.
Back when you had to wait for the paper on monday, and add up your stats with pencil and paper, the journey to this game has been long and arduous. Havin gotten one game away for three years outta the 15 I've been around, it's a big fuckin day tommorra.
All my ex-girlfriends have gotten used to the yelling at the tv every sunday in the fall. They have all gotten used to them "bein served up as sexual slaves to players who do well". All have gotten ok with the wearing of jerseys the night before.
Well, the time is here. Destiny is at my feet. And I'd like to thank everyone in my life who got us here. You share a piece of this title if we win it tommorra.
May The Sorry Sal's Stormin Tumors wreack havoc ove The Cragorian Apocolyptic Valkyries tommorra.
I've waited to so very long..........

a CRAZE

The only bummer to this is the 40 losers sweatin him in the background. No doubt they all were at the door carryin two records sayin they "wuz wit da dj", but who cares ultimately. This guy is outta fuckin hand.
The only thing missin from the freeloaders in the background is a dozen Monterey Jack and chicken 7-11 taquitos.

Fun shit.....

I wouldn't object to this kinda hinjinx, except that everytime I go to a zoo one of these monkeys is always sittin in front of a crowd of laughing children as he eats his own shit for a half hour....

oooof

Att: "Shoddy" you run of the mill gangsta bore

Yo Shoddy thug bitch. I would fight you, which is not a good sign of your marketing. Cause if you wanna be the next hard ass, I gotta be fuckin terryfied of you for "thug life" routine to work.
I would absolutely step to you, and knock those fugaze jouster shades right off your melon. Would you more than likely beat my ass? Sure. But I still WOULD.
I think we're ALL a bit tired of this one man.
And T.I. My mancrush. Don't even give this hoodrat the time of day. He's just using you to get some facetime on Hip-Hop weekly.
Just get back to FUCKING ANYONE YOU WANT AT ANYTIME. It's such a better look.
You've made your loot. Get outta this routine.
It's time for ychts, cha,pagne, dumb cars, dumber rims, and plowing through an ass line-up that is still forming across 50 states.
This "Shoddy" dude looks like he smells like bbq. Which aint a bad thing, unless he's sweatin next to you in a leather jacket, in a bad ed hardy shirt.
Peace it out gents.

It's only fair.....

Unfortunately this is where I go. Post break-up, feelin like my heart is in 2 jillion pieces a few years back. I turn into a bad screaming out for attention freakshow. Enjoy the dust. I was mildly juiced up on my normal dose of functional 3 pints a day vodka habit.
Children shouldn't drink adult beverages.

Yo Cringle....

You got a serious case of "dads ass".
Not good......

Just fuckin shut up and Enjoy

Like anything he does, it's just everyone DYING and STRUGLLIN PAINFULLY to keep up..... He is GOD. And this is just him givin a fuckin award away.

Will II

Just in case anyone had ANY doubt that Will is WEIRD.....

I'm officially fuckin OBSESSED.

Meet Will

Will might be the weirdest dude on youtube. Which menas we will be checkin in with him often.
I do weird.
Will is completely NOT tryin to be weird. this is real real weird.
IM WAY INTO WILL.

Heroes

I just had to cleanse myself a bit after Skank-Ho.
Don't they just make it look fun and full and depthful and weightful and honest and clear and compromising and useful and with purpose and full of laughter and happiness and triumph and glory?
He knows his place, and she knows how to allow him the illusion of bein the boss.

GUYS!!! I'm MOVIN IN!!!!!!

Attention Skank-Ho

You know what Ho?
lemme ask a question.... WHY THE FUCK DO YOU GET MARRIED????!!!!!
Last I checked, and even more so down "on the block", Latin mamas take this marriage shit kinda serious. There's usually a standard form of "till death do us part" part that I guess you fuckin exclude from your ridiculousness.
NEWSFLASH Ho!!!! you don't have to get married every 18 months.
It's a horrid example for kids, actually YOU are now a horrid example for kids.
Personally, if I ever get married that's it. No Matter What. My woman could go on an "I'm suckin everyone's cock but yours" World Tour, and I'd STILL stick around, grind it out, hit the therapist, take my beatin, because that's the only way I think marriage can work. There are NO OUTS. The second humans feel an out, it becomes an option. And Marriage should be a heavy, got you no matter what kinda thing.
You treat these dudes like the new hot club.
Off to the next one, when the old one goes through a lull.
It actually gets me more and more angry just thinkin about it and the way you behave. You kinda played the "I wanna be an example for young girls" at one point I believe. This is a fuckin joke.
The next joker you line up to "get-back" marry deserves the stupidity of you.
Any man who would actually take you seriously in this area of your life is marryin you for the wrong reason anyway.
You piss me off.
You make a LOT of fuckin money and chose to be in the public eye. And with that comes some kind of responsibility through your behavior.
I guess we just have to chalk you up to "wildly emotionally damaged, insane female, hyper ambitious lost cause" broad.

love,
Shane

P.S. I'd knock that ass AROUND so good, you'd, well, probly wanna marry me.

Gratuitous, shirtless, fake glasses, bearded, gettin my hair to viggo in Indian Runner soon pic

Pure fuckin Gold

Don't sleep on Dane Cook. This is truly a fuckin GEM.

Egad

This is what happens when really uneducated people are SO FUCKIN BORED WITH ONE ANOTHER that they start to actually go insane....

wowowowowowowowowowowowwwwwwwwwweeeeeeee.

And I'm SURE they don't live somewhere like Idaho. I swear to God if this ever happened to me, where I got this kinda place, I would take a fork and drive all the way into my ear drum.

The more I think about how fuckin BORED these two are with life, the more it freaks me out.

"The Man"

It's that time of year. Enjoy the tribute to "The Man" himself....
Life is perfect. A word of caution. About a minute into this "the Man" throws down a smile, and I almost unloaded a giant mouth ful of espresso on to my monitor. This is amazing funny.
I wouldn't touch you with a 39 and a half foot pole???!!!!

geniussssnessssssssss!!!!!!!!!

WOW!!!!!!!

this is just too fuck beautiful to even fathom. I had obviously heard the rumors for a few years, and I even got to sit one on one with Poppa for seven minutes backstage at a fundraiser for his Senate campaign run. I was smoking, and he said "blow the smoke this way".
WORD.

Post Below

Is really not that interesting, and kinda really stupid. I have a cold and I can't find the clever...

i'm a jerk today.

Familiar

This just seems eerily representative of humans.. Creep male begs and stalks, female aint havin it.
I don't have to go out tonight after this.

Gettin it done

This fuckin BLOKE came off the street from sellin carphones, and fuckin HANDLED HIS FUCKIN BUSINESS! One look at this dudes face, and all I wanted to do was snuggle him, and let him eat crumpets in bed. Whatever the fuck a crumpet is.

Real Problems

Is what you have if this guy gets anywhere NEAR your woman. I've never been a fan of those, "we each get 5" if we ever can lists couples have, but this dude HAS to be right at the fuckin top of the list of all of em.
Sexy, dangerous, clever, and cultured and mannered, hes mowing down all groups. Thre isn't a sick naughty fantasy this dude can't provide your mama.
Sometimes it's just like that. In fact, one night I was so wasted and acting ridiculous I offered my woman up to this dude, word.
Don't fight what's inevitable. Just lean into it and face some of the pain.
Clive Owen. I'm so afraid of you.

rrraaaaawwwwwrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!

This is fuckin whack. And completely unecessary and fuckin wrong. And these poor women don't need a surgeon they need a fuckin couple dozen therapists.
Any plastic surgeon who makes a decision to continue "working" on this type of woman needs to have their fuckin license revoked and fuckin sued.
Doctors preyin on the deep emotional insecurities of women and "raping" them, which is what this is, are fuckin dark fuckin awful quacks.
I mean really. What do you tell these women after the 63rd cheek implant??!! You need another just to really sell home you becoming of Mufasa from the Lion King?
These doctors are fuckin awful awful people.

Finger fuck alert

Omaha, early 80's....parks, parties, cars, wherever... I ALWAYS handled the business of "3rd base" better to this song.

A Trillion in...

And we can't get these dudes better weapons?!
This guy has just cost himself 10-15 years of his life, just to tag Bush with a shoe. That's how pissed some of these people are at us, THE GREAT LIBERATORS.

I must say, The Prez showed decent agility with the first duck.

Stay there, willya, Dubya? We will fly Laura and your suitcase ova forya, Dubya.

Jan. 20 CANNOT come soon enough.....

Love is....

The idea that nothing feels remotely like her hand. Nothing.
Love is bigger than what I can usually contemplate. It is full, and it makes my belly fuzzy. It charts me away from so many bad and limiting ideas that I have learned about myself.
Love is noticing a raindrop on her nose that makes her shivery and cold and wipin it away and bundling her up.
It's the opening of my eyes to notice the huge importance of the only tiny things that matter.
Love makes warriors outta weaklings.
It's catching your breath because she just came through the door.
Love is choiceless.
It demands my accountability and makes me a better human.
Love is the safety of familiarity.
She can be right next to me, and I have the freedom to act like I'm alone.

Love is....

University of P E R F E C T

Online college degrees.
Great. I will be locking this kid in my basement with 5 cases of Red Bull and a password to BangBros.com and I should have my degree in what, 3 weeks?
And with my online degree in business, I should be able to skip "fry station" and jump right into drive-through captain??!!!
Cause anyone who's trying to study and play "Doom 4" should be allowed the freedom of on-line college rules. Which by the way, are what?
Help please.....

World Worship Federation II

Pastor Bentley and his wife have recently put out this statement to their flock:


We wish to thank all of our friends and partners for the overwhelming flood of support and compassion we have received as a ministry on behalf of Todd and Shonnah Bentley. The many phone calls and emails of concern from people who genuinely love the Bentleys and Fresh Fire Ministries have been a great encouragement to all of us here during these past few days. In particular, the rallying of support and prayer for Todd and Shonnah by prominent leaders within the Body of Christ has been a beautiful indicator of the maturity and grace the Lord is bringing to his Bride.

We wish to acknowledge, however, that since our last statement from the Fresh Fire Board of Directors, we have discovered new information revealing that Todd Bentley has entered into an unhealthy relationship on an emotional level with a female member of his staff. In light of this new information and in consultation with his leaders and advisors, Todd Bentley has agreed to step down from his position on the Board of Directors and to refrain from all public ministry for a season to receive counsel in his personal life.


Personally I think a Pentecostal Healer-Pastor should be able to fuck anybody he wants, but whatevs....

World Worship Federation

You can't make this shit up.
Meet Todd Bentley. Sorry, Pastor Todd Bentley.
Pastor Bentley evidently, routinely heals those in need. A skectched out lunatic in his teens, Pastor Bentley found ole Jesus himself.
Please watch above as Pastor Bentley does something to his wife, which I still don't know after watching three times.
The only thing missing from this insanity is Jimmy "Superfly" Snooka flingin himself off a turnbuckle.
For information about joining this Pentecostal Wrestling Association Prayer Freakshow, go HERE.